#i just think showers are like a sensory nightmare

[anarchafemme]

can someone invent dry shampoo that can actually clean and exfoliate your scalp, and control dandruff, and also remove hairspray, and also never have any buildup? thanks in advance

[bluebirdsfeathers]

First Day

──────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──────

Relationship: Ceo!Wanda X Butch!Loser!Reader

Summery: You are a new intern at Westview paper hoping to make a good first impression with you new boss, Wanda.

Words: 1.5k

Warnings: Classism, use of y/n nothing else

A/N: inspired by this post by @wandaslittlehorns this was meant to be short but I really like this idea, so this is just part one now haha.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

──────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──────

──────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──────

You shot up in bed, the sound of your alarm belting in your ears. Aimlessly you smacked your bedside table, though you weren’t sure if the collection of cardboard boxes next to your mattress on the ground could be considered one, you eventually found and turned it off. Grabbing your phone, you looked at the time. “Shit…” You groan. Somehow, you’d slept though both of your previous alarms, the one that woke you was intended to let you know it was time to leave.

Today was the first day of your new internship and now you were going to be late. Great first impression. Jumping to your feet you make your way to the bathroom, you don’t particularly smell so some time could be saved by forgoing a shower. You get dressed and drench yourself in axe body spray. Your wrinkled white shirt had a small stain that you hid by tucking it into your jeans. They were black so it wasn’t like you weren’t trying to look professional with your limited wardrobe and budget.

Before long you were riding the cramped subway drinking what was left of the monster energy you’d grabbed before leaving on you way to your first full-time job since graduating college. An internship at the Westview Paper wasn’t something you just got handed. You had worked hard but you were by no means the hardest worker. You did however have a talent for getting stuff done quickly, all the assignments you completed the night before could prove that. It was weird that you had gotten picked for this position, you could think of at least five more deserving people in your graduating class alone. Especially since you thought you bombed the last interview stage. She was in the room for that. Wanda Maximoff, the CEO of Westview Paper. Though she hadn’t spoken a word, just sat at the back of the room occasionally making notes while you were grilled by a very intense man in a far too expensive suit.

As you emerged from the subway, lost in a sea of other commuters, you scanned your surroundings for Westview Tower, the homebase of the Paper’s operations, now your place of work. Checking the time as you rushed through the spinning door you were revealed to see you were only three minutes late. Standing in the lobby you looked around at all the people cutting through clearly on a mission to get somewhere faster than any human reasonably could. Lots shouted down phones while others talked into earpieces, not a single person without coffee in hand. Slowly you made your way to the front desk, “Hi, I’m y/n… I’m part of the new internship.” You said sheepishly, embarrassed slightly you didn’t know where you were meant to be, you were sure it was probably mentioned in an email somewhere. “Do you know where…”

“Third floor, room 43B, you’re late by the way.” The women at the front desk didn’t even look at you, just continued to type on the computer and chew gum. “Right, sorry, Thank you.” You took a few steps toward the elevator before she spoke again, slightly too loud for the distance between you. “Forgetting something? You won’t get very far without this sweetie.” She dangles your employee badge, and you retreat to collect it, cringing slightly at the pet-name.

Finally, you were able to leave the sensory nightmare that was the lobby and enter the elevator. It was just you alone with your reflection in the mirror. Your hair was a mess. Have you looked like that the whole time? Is that why the receptionist was rude? Was she even being rude or is that just how people talk to each other here? You took a deep breath and tried to tidy your appearance, feeling much more self-conscious than you did ten minutes ago. The doors to the elevator opened to the Third floor and you set out on finding room 43B.

The room was easy enough to find and by the looks of things nothing had started yet. The other interns were all just talking amongst themselves, so you grabbed an office chair and joined the conversation. “So, y/n, did you do anything nice between graduation and now?” One of the male interns, the one with the most punchable face although it was a stiff competition, asked with a grating the tone of voice. “Oh well my parents took me to the Cheesecake Factory to celebrate,” the others laughed as if there was some joke everyone was in on but you, “Then we went to the cinema to watch the new Godzilla movie.” Again, laughter and you shifted awkwardly in your chair.

You weren’t left with the feeling for long as soon the door swung open and several very well-dressed people entered. Following what everyone else was doing you stood up and went over to great them. You went down the line of businessmen, each one either smelling like tobacco or overpriced cologne. You weren’t really looking them in the face as you made quick introductions, that was until you reached a hand with deep red nail polish. Lifting your head you met the gaze of Wanda Maximoff. She was dressed in a black suit with her white shirt slightly unbuttoned. Your brain buffered for a moment before you realised how long you’d been holding her hand. “Hi! I’m y/n.” You felt your cheeks heat up and quickly let go, painfully aware of how sweaty your palms now were. “Pleasure to meet you.” Wanda smiled while looking you in the eyes and you quickly became interested in looking at the floor, meaning you didn’t see how her eyes linger on you as she moved to great the next person.

What followed was a boring meeting about company goals for the next quarter, you tried to pay attention but felt your thoughts drifting to the events of earlier. It had quickly become evident you existed in a different tax bracket to everyone in the room. Your joyous memory of dinner and a movie now slightly tainted by comparison to the rewards of ski vacations and new designer goods your peers had received. While lost in thought your eyes found their way to Wanda as she once again sat at the back of the room and took notes. It was clear she’d paused her writing to look at you, catching you slightly slouched staring off into space. She shook her head disapprovingly, making you sit up straight instantly to which she gave a small laugh that only added to your embarrassment.

As the meeting drew to a close, you said your goodbyes to the higher ups, only managing a respectful nod in Wanda’s direction, before heading to lunch with the interns. “So, who do you think she’s going to pick?” Mildred, girl with the whitest teeth you’d ever seen, spoke to you in a hashed tone as you stood just outside the office room.

“Pick for what?”

“To be her personal intern? Were you not listening in there?” She sounded slightly annoyed. “We are all going to be assigned to different departments, so who do you think it’s going to be?”

“Oh, I don’t know…” You found yourself looking back into the room you’d just left; you could see Wanda talking to someone through the internal windows. She was beautiful, you’d love to be her intern, learning from the best. As she exited the room, she gave you one last look and a small wave before heading down the hall in the other direction. “Maybe it’ll be me.” You said without really thinking. Mildred scoffed and mumbled something under her breath before speeding off to catch up with the others.

The rest of the day was spent learning fire safety and being given a tour of the building. Passive aggressive comments from the other interns got less effective as you noticed you weren’t the only one receiving them and before you knew it you were back on the subway heading home. Getting off a stop early you decided to pick up a pizza as a reward for surviving your first day, the streets were a lot calmer near your apartment on the outskirts of the city, and the walk was enjoyable in the cool September weather. Your apartment was small, a studio with only the very basics, it was all you could afford on your previous job’s salary. But now you were going to be earning so much more, and you hand big plans for that first pay-check, like maybe a bed frame.

[lucimaaie]

ellie as spiderwoman hcs ✧.* au

a/n- honestly was just an excuse for me to watch spiderman again and i took it, kind of switch between would’ve and did idk babes im just having fun atp

playlist | spidey masterlist

she'd have lost her mom at a young age and been placed with joel, who she never gets along with at first, thinking he's just a bil ol meanie who wanted an extra check every month.

that was until he showed he cared, not through hugs and affection in the traditional sense, but making sure she did her homework, picking her up everyday, getting her out of her room, checking on her when she'd been too quiet. "you okay, kiddo?" and "i heard talking helps." he'd say as he leaned on the door frame. eventually, she couldn't help but love him.

absolutely a nerd. though, when she got teased, she didn't exactly back down as expected which landed her in the detention a few times and some talking-to's. but she won and defended herself. no one could be mad at her for that. still, she was smart. she was going to be an astronaut after all. though that dream died in middle school.

high school came and she tried to straighten up. no more fighting bullies, even if they deserved it. she was better than that. she would get an internship, the internship that would line everything up, get her a scholarship so she could study aerospace engineering, get rich and get joel out of the old house on a patch of land with however many sheep he wanted. the same internship that got her bitten by a radioactive spider and shooting webs out her wrists.

words could not describe how much she worried joel when she woke up the day after, crushing her alarm clock, breaking the sink, the shower rack, everything. she skipped that day, hanging out on the rooftop of the house while joel was away stuck between having a panic attack from the sensory overload and telling someone, anyone. she decided on testing them out which earned her quite a few bruises joel luckily chalked up to another fight. "we gotta talk about this fighting thing sometime." she'd roll her eyes, saying something snarky before limping up the stairs. "say what you want but i win," "i heard that!"

also sidebar: ellie as a new yorker...whew. honestly ellie as anything- anyway.

hours or research ensue on cross-species genetics, spiderbites, different types of spiders, everything that made her feel disgusting. she slammed her laptop closed, crushing the poor thing.

it felt like there were a million things to do with her newfound powers but the only two on her mind was impress dina and swing from the rooftops. c’mon, she was 16 with the powers of a freaking spider. who said saving people would the first thing on her mind? she felt powerful, even weirder than she already felt but still powerful.

it was terrible, watching joel get more and more disappointed in her as she got distracted. “i’m a good kid! i just got distracted, gimmie a break.” “i have given you plenty. more than i should’ve. and that’s on me. that's my mistake to make you think that coming home late and fighting and blowing me off is okay.”

“i can't help how i turned out! don't blame me for being a shitty dad.” she yelled before slamming the door and stalking off into who knows where. she didn't even mean it, she was just stressed, she never meant any of it. hours later, she’d wish those words never came out her mouth.

she'd hoped she was having some cruel nightmare when she saw joel laid out on the pavement. "some help me! c-call an ambulance. don't just fucking stand there-" her voice was raw as she screamed out. "c'mon, don't die on me. y-you can't. i'm sorry? is that what you wanna hear? i'm sorry."

she hated the looks of pity, everyone's soft voices. people who never once talked to her suddenly caring. it was all fake. they didn't know her and they sure and hell didn't know joel.

she became another person for a while. quieter, more closed off. sometimes snappy. laser focused on finding the low-life took joel from her. that's when she started wearing the mask. the basic concept of it anyway and it caught on with the people, more than she imagined. ellie scoffed at the name spider-woman at first, thinking it was ridiculous. she wasn't some circus performer, she was just trying to find the killer.

dina as her mj, reaching out to her after joel’s death, inviting her over for dinner, talking to her in class, all of it. it wasn’t the same disingenuous pity she hated, she could feel she cared. so she allowed her feelings to fester. being with her actually helped. it was one more thing to balance with school and the internship and her mission, but it was more person in her life. she needed that.

one day ellie went running towards the trouble. not because joel's killer was there or cause of some adrenaline rush, but because she needed to do something. to not be helpless for once. she wasn't helpless. she hadn't felt completely in control of her body as she webbed a whole bridge back together and pulled cars back onto the surface, but in the end it was a like a high. it still ached to see kids running to their parents and everyone running to their families, but they were all safe. she did that. and that felt better than getting revenge and letting it suck the life out of her. so she'd wear the spandex and the mask and go by the stupid name. only cause it meant something now.

thank you for reading!

[radfemfessing]

Listen, I dont really care if you shave or if you have a bush or something. But there are a bunch of takes surrounding this topic that always make me roll my eyes. 1) "everytime i let my pubic hair grow it gets so itchy :(" Let it grow more! Of course stubble will be itchy! what did you think! Some bushes grow fast but mine took over three months to be at a comfortable length. 2) "sEnSoRY iSsuEs" oh my god shut up. Shaved bush is a sensory nightmare. It lasts for one day or so and then it gets stubbly. Shaving itself is a sensory nightmare. "rubbing smooth legs together" is also a one-day thing. And also why do adhd/autistic men NEVER have "unshaved anything" as a sensory trigger? 3) "I just feel more clean" Shaving always is an invitation for infections and irritation and ingrown hairs. Tiny invisible cuts let all kinds of disgusting crap into your body. The hair is there for a reason, it protects you. If you pubic hair stinks, you are not washing yourself enough and shaving won't save you. Go take a shower. 4) I am aware that there might be medical conditions that require you to shave something but I don't believe 98% percent of you when you tell me that having natural normal body hair not ripped out or cut off for some reason is medically necessary. Like. Even for surgeries doctors told me to not shave at all and that theyd do it during surgery. Self diagnosing with bald pussy syndrome In conclusion.. just say you don't want to stop shaving because it's a part of female socialisation you can't get rid of (yet). I'll judge you WAY less than for any of the above mentioned bullshit. In fact, I won't judge you at all. Female socialization is one hell of a drug, its not easy to shake. If it was, radical feminism would be useless. Just be honest with yourself and others

⛲️

[guillotine-drop]

Rating POSTAL Dudes by how good they smell:

POSTAL - 9/10: I think his habitual reclusion and distrust of the world would probably mean he’s showering constantly, moreso than any other Dude, especially if he thinks there’s a ‘Hate Plague’ going on. I think he smells basic; very simple routine, just enough to make sure he feels clean, so at most he’ll smell like some generic 3-in-1 body wash and shampoo/conditioner, maybe something slightly nicer just for himself (some decent $15 aftershave for that menthol scent and cooling relief).

POSTAL Redux - 3/10: Exact opposite of his original incarnation, this greasy son of a bitch isn’t scared of shit he just wants to throw explosives at ostriches and parades. Barely showers, constantly stinks of stale sweat, old blood, cheap leather and cheaper cologne, punctuated with the scent of burnt gunpowder. Borderline noxious.

POSTAL 2 - 4/10: Smells just as bad as Redux Dude but gets the edge here because every now and then he goes outside and uses the neighbor’s hose to blast himself. Shockingly uses deodorant, still not enough to be perpetually leather and denim clad in the great state of Arizona. Almost constantly reeks of sweat and has the recognizable yet faint scent of stale piss wafting off of him, accompanied by the scent of even staler crack and pungent fast food. Almost pungent enough to drown the rest out. Almost.

POSTAL 3 - 2/10: If you were to raid the wash cart after a double overtime football game, steal every jockstrap in the place, wring the sweat into a bucket, and then bring it all to a boil, you’d have somewhere in the realm of what a clean P3 Dude smells like. On average, however, this man has managed to combine the overwhelming sensory nightmares of cat piss and cheap spray deodorant into an almost lethal concoction, ONLY made breathable by the strange and overpowering smell of gasoline that seems to seep from his pores. Approach with caution and for the love of god: do not bring bleach or matches near this freak.

POSTAL 4: No Regerts - 5/10: Despite looking like he crawled out of a dumpster after a bad divorce or a fantastic honeymoon, P4 Dude is shockingly passable in terms of being able to stand next to him for a prolonged period without gagging or killing him. Having learned the efficacy of not being encased in leather in the desert, he’s managed to bring his pungency down several notches. Still reeks of sweat most of the time, and the smell of burger grease and pepperoni follows him like a specter of death, but the piss scent stopped clinging on as hard. He’s also upgraded from hose showers with no supplies to sink baths with tiny gas station travel soaps. It’s an improvement, trust me.

Brain Damaged - 2/10: Take a look at his living space in the title screen, then watch the game’s cutscenes. Just soak it all in. Now that you’ve done that, you can understand that his rank ass smells exactly as bad as you might think it does. If it can come out of his body, it’s probably soaking some part of him. If you think any of the clothes on him have been washed, you’re wrong. This man smells like if someone firebombed an outhouse and pissed on it to put it out. The best thing for him would be getting blasted with a firehouse and a box of laundry detergent. Please.

The Other Dude - 1-10/10: Entirely depends on how the BD Dude would imagine he smells depending on the situation.

POOSTALL Dude - 6/10: Despite the name, this one actually smells pretty decent. The clearly larger coat with the rolled sleeves implies some level of understanding about how not to smell like swamp ass and sweat soaked leather, and truthfully, he looks like he bathes semi-regularly, a rarity amongst these guys.

POSTAL Doe - 9/10: I admit fully and entirely to my lack of impartiality to this one, but I’m willing to stand by it even if I lose my Stink Judge License: first of all, sleeveless leather trench coat AND a crop top mean less overheat which means less sweat. Second of all, visually cleaner than pretty much any of the dudes which implies some kind of self care regimen. Third, and most importantly, girlstink counts positive. I will not be turning in my badge or my gun.

Movie Dude - 8/10: This may be controversial, but despite the squalor he lives in and the fact that hems a cuckold and that his life sucks and that he can’t get a job and that he’s a loser- I digress. I think Movie Dude is in the top echelons of Dude Stink solely because I think he’d have a breakdown if he smelled bad. This man uses Dr. Teals. He stinks like a mix of eucalyptus and peppermint. If ever there was a Dude who had a skin routine, he still wouldn’t, but he’d definitely think about it one day. I think by the end he gets an extra point just because he gets a little hotter the more deranged he is. Overall very pleasant but I still wouldn’t give him $4.

John Murray - 2/10: Hasselridge seems to have a very… interesting relationship with what is and isn’t normal, so unsurprisingly, Johnny Boy would probably smell pretty rough. Considering how dingy, run down and shitty everything in that town appears to be, I can’t imagine anyone else is smelling like roses either. Just avoid the entire place, not least of all because of the zombie thing.

Shtopor - 0/10: Bad.

Nottem Portant - 5/10: Despite the misanthropy, dollar store Nathan Explosion thing and the absolutely abysmal gameplay, Mr. Hatred is actually extremely middle of the road on stink. Sure, he doesn’t smell great, but shockingly he washes his ass despite the whole ‘death to humanity’ thing. He does get point deduction for not washing his hair though, grease mop motherfucker.

[qoldenskies]

Horse throat, bloodied nails, claw marks on his skin, vomit, blood, piss (and poop maybe? 😭), no showers, no water, no food, and very little circulation for FOUR DAYS

Even WITHOUT severe sensory issues, that's a fucking nightmare

not to mention this came right after weeks of him not sleeping or eating properly/spiraling into paranoia (due to pretty severe psychological abuse), and he was already panicking when he was PUT in there. and it was nearly pitch-black with only a tiny sliver of light under the door. 8 feet of space at the very most. like that is torture. that is actually torture.

i genuinely think the really intense night terrors he's been having make perfect sense. even after raph and leo cleaned it up i dont think they have any way of it properly being put into perspective for them just how horrible and traumatic that was. there is genuinely no way to describe an experience like that without living it. and then they pulled him into the family meeting two days later.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

aita for asking my partner to shower?

So my partner has adhd and some other stuff going on (the other stuff is as yet unknown to me, they see a psychiatrist regularly but I don't pry because if they want to tell me anything about that then they will of their own volition). anyways they've opened up to me in the past about having issues with hygiene which is fine, I think everyone struggles with aspects of that to some degree and there's no shame in it especially if there's mental health stuff in the mix. But showering in particular is very hard for them, it's a sensory nightmare and I respect that. We've even talked about how best to adapt the shower to their needs, what things can we do to make it less of a pain and less debilitating on them, and I've been pretty enthusiastic, I think, about adding things to the bathroom to make it a better experience. Especially because I don't want them to think I don't care or am not willing to adapt with them.

Yet this seems to go nowhere because they will go months without bathing. To the point they have an obvious smell to them. I try to be as gentle as possible when I tell them hey, you may want to shower but every single time they treat me like I'm a major bitch about it. I've tried different approaches, tried encouraging them to make use of the adaptability things we've added to the bathroom for them, offered to shower with them (as like a comfort thing if that would make them feel better) but they always go stone cold silent and get this mean look on their face before walking out and I hear the bathroom door slam. Then we don't talk for a while after they come out of the shower.

I genuinely don't think I'm being mean or unaccommodating, I do everything I can think of to not be that way yet they always act like I just said the rudest things possible to them when I've never and will never do that because I really do care about them with all my heart. But at the same time I've kind of given up, after our latest argument about the showering. They said I'm insensitive and pushy, maybe I am and I'm just not seeing it. Am I being pushy because they said they're a grown adult and don't need to be parented by me and that they'll shower when they're ready and I'm just being a nag. But a part of me doesn't believe that because it wouldn't go on for so long and reach a point of obvious smell if they were planning on showering.

So am I being more of a parent than a partner and also an asshole without meaning to be?

What are these acronyms?

[michael-the-candybar]

Hey hey! I saw your Barty headcanons and thought they were SUPERB! Do you happen to have any Evan ones as well??

omg thank you! and oh i have so many i think i actually have like 3 separate posts on him but ill do another cause why not!

• if evan was an animagus(i think thats how you spell it) he’d either be a ferret or a possum but i dont hate the fennec fox idea either.

• ironically, he’s terrified of snakes and unfortunately learns this when barty adds a new addition to the dorms

• he and barty have matching rings on necklaces

• the dorm room is litered with his taxidermy projects

• yk how everyone has a crush on monty when they meet him? i feel like evan had that, but on barty’s dad before learning all the shit about him (barty was mortified when he found out)

• breaks spaghetti, he hates that it doesn’t fit into the pot when raw so he just snaps it. barty never allowed him back into the kitchen

• lowkey a germaphobe, but like he refuses to eat something if he saw someone lick a utensil and put it back in the dish

•huge sensory issues when it comes to clothing, if barty’s wear a shirt that bothers him and its touching him, he forces barty to either take the shirt off or change

• this ones sad but ace evan who is so repulsed by sex that he threw up after the first time he tried to be intimate with someone

• when he’s stressed he’ll rearrange the dorm but than it stresses him out even more and eventually he just shuts down

• freezing cold showers in the morning kinda guy

• he has glasses but no one knows cause he just wears contacts

• i love the hc of pandora as a seer and cause i see them as twins, i think evan would have a similar gift except it would come in the forms of vague nightmares that he always forgets when he wakes up

[stimmingandstruggling]

it’s such a simple thing but i am so proud of myself for brushing my teeth.

i never built up the habit. it was sensory hell as a little kid and i very quickly learned to avoid it, which then created a sort of irrational fear of it. fast forward years and i still struggle. it isn’t such a nightmare anymore, but my gums are sick and sensitive and painful, and i just. don’t have the habit. and routine changes are scary.

there were times i’d be like okay, i’m finally going to commit to it, twice a day every day, and then slip up in less than a week and feel like shit and go back to avoiding it all. but then my dentist said something that literally changed the game. “don’t just go full throttle, you won’t stick with it. pick a couple days a week and be consistent with those.”

so i started keeping my toothbrush and paste and floss in my shower bucket. and for the past few months, i have brushed my teeth EVERY time i have showered. this is fucking HUGE for me! it’s not ideal, but once every two days or so?? I HAVE NOT BRUSHED MY TEETH THIS MUCH SINCE MT PARENTS LITERALLY DID IT FOR ME. and it HURTS less! my gums don’t bleed anymore! i looked in the mirror today and they were mostly PINK. PINK!!!!! i cannot remember a time when my gums were not red and puffy but they’re pink and they don’t bleed and they don’t hurt!

i’m thinking of ways to make a transition to every day smoother. and i WANT to now. i actually WANT to! routine changes are hard but i WANT this to become a part of my routine because i actually FEEL BETTER. woah

[barzfrommarz]

do you have any physical disability headcanons for c!wilbur? if not, how about mental? :0

- harlan

(the c!wilbur fictive of the watchers' vault collective)

YES I DO

-Needs a cane for stability after revival. He noticed the pain starting in late pogtopia but he died before he could address it

-Has been slowly loosing his hearing due to the explosions during L'manburg and on the 16th and eventually from the trains in Limbo. When he comes back his hearing is so fucked he will sometimes completely ignore people without realizing

-Sensory issues make it hard for him to shower because he hates the feeling of water on his skin. His depression also plays a role in his lack of showering

-Intrusive thoughts make it hard for him to function most days. Some days he will spend hours locked up in his house/van constantly checking every lock over and over until he feels better (he gets right back to it a few minutes later)

-His brain is so rattled he will sometimes have absent seizures and no one realizes it. They just think he's spacing out because they dont last long

-arthritis in his wrists makes it hard for him to write, cook, clean etc and he really hates it because he feels like he's weak for not being able to do basic things

-really bad insomnia. Used to take sleep medications but stopped when they started to give him bad nightmares. Now most of the time the longest he sleeps is about 2-5 hours a night. It once got so bad he collapsed and Quackity was the one to find him face down in the sand

-Fibromyalgia causes him to have really bad migraines and some days he cant even get out of bed because of it

-POTS can cause him to completely faint when stands up sometimes but he brushes it off as him not eating enough

-Executive dysfunction hits him hard most days. Sometimes he will just sit there for hours telling himself to get up and then he gets mad at himself for being "lazy"

-HE HAS TOURETTES BECAUSE I HAVE TOURETTES. He hides his tics from others because he fears it makes him look crazy and he knows his reputation is already fucked and he doesn't want to make it worst. This can lead to tic attacks that last a while (and hurt alot)

-His eyesight has gotten progressively worse over the years and he now has cataracts

-His sensory issues make it hard for him to be out in places like las nevadas or sometimes even at a family dinner. He also is really particular about clothes and food

-flashbacks from his c-pstd can cause him to completely shut down for hours and they usually pop up out of nowhere. Some Days he can handle it and others he cant

[allisluv]

Lucy gray comforting autistic reader when melting down

pairing: lucy gray x fem!autistic!reader

content warnings: meltdowns and harmful stimming (scratching). mentions of being overstimulated. other than that, this is really just hurt/comfort.

authors note: this is based off my personal experience as an autistic person having a meltdown. every meltdown will look different and that's important to remember!

word count: a little under 600

You could almost always tell when a meltdown was bubbling on the surface. Today is no exception.

First, you had ran out of your safe foods and then when you ventured down to the market with Lucy Gray to see if they had any left, they'd broke the news that fresh stock would not be arriving for at least one more week.

You had begrudgingly force-fed yourself a bowl of cereal, and tried to wash it down with a glass of orange juice, only to remember that you had finished the carton off yesterday.

It was relatively warm, too, which normally wouldn't bother you, but today it's a sensory nightmare. You strip down into nothing but a pair of underwear and your bra, but your body temperature is still too hot for your liking.

Your bra strap is digging into your skin and the lacy pair of panties that you usually wear feel too constricting.

You don't have meltdowns often, but when you do, boy, do you know about it. It might seem silly to a neurotypical person if they found out that you lost control because of a few things going wrong in your day, but to you, it was a big deal and far too much for you to process.

As Lucy Gray hangs up clean clothes in your shared wardrobe, she softly suggests having a shower to see if it'll help you cool down. While you know she’s only trying to help, it’s the final straw that sends you toppling headfirst over the edge.

You start to sob and rock back and forth on your bed, hands flapping as you try to regulate your emotions. Lucy Gray turns around and in a split second, she's kneeling in front of you, asking what she can do to help.

Lucy Gray has been with you for long enough to understand that your needs differ from each and every meltdown. Sometimes you need to be held, and other times, you don't want to be touched at all.

She takes it upon herself to close the blinds. She has a feeling your head is starting to hurt right about now. She’s back by your side in an instant, whispering. “Tell me what I can do to help, sugar.”

It takes a minute for you to get the words out. “Can— can you hold me? Tightly?”

Lucy Gray nods and gestures for you to sit on the wooden floorboards with her. She pulls you close and wraps her arms tightly around your middle. She rocks the both of you back and forth, all the while whispering reassuring words into your hairline and pressing soft kisses to your forehead.

When your sobs have dulled to quiet whimpers and you've stopped scratching at the skin of your arms, you whisper a quiet, "I'm sorry," into her blouse.

Lucy Gray tuts and cradles your head with the back of her hand. "You don't have to apologise. Not to me, sweet girl. Are you feeling any better?" You shake your head no, and she hums in understanding. "That's alright, darlin'. I think a nap might be in order, what do you think?"

[cedarxwing]

Scent Freak Hannibal (Holes in the Floor of the Mind)

Hannibal is 10x more freakish about smells in the books, and it manifests in some subtle ways in the show.

Hannibal's characterization as a lovable serial killer is a brilliant literary feat. Part of what makes him so likable is how receptive he is to sensation. He's almost childlike in how he experiences the world. His narration is so vivid with description that it makes him seem more alive, more human, than the other characters, whose inner voices are dull and flat by comparison. He is powerfully influenced by sights, sounds, textures, and especially smells, all leading to memory. It's very Proustian and psychological.

Warning: long post below.

Red Dragon

Aside from the iconic aftershave dig, Hannibal uses scent to decide to get Will's home address. This is the very first peek into Hannibal's POV we get in the series:

First mention of Hannibal's nemesis: the toilet (more on that later). They cleaned his toilet with Clorox -> bleach -> semen -> irritating man scent -> Will Graham

Will smells like teaweed, which grows in the southeast US -> Hannibal is thinking about where Will might live (Florida). (Like how Hannibal smells pine on Will in the show.)

Hannibal can smell Will's thoughts which are warm and brassy

Will's warm, brass thoughts are incorporated in the show! Will's silver pendulum, as it was described in the book, was changed to yellow. In season 1, whenever we enter his crime scene reconstruction POV, the lighting completely changes and there's a warm filter:

(I also like to interpret the shift in warmth as Will feeling more alive when he's closer to a killer's thoughts, but that's just me)

The Stool Pit

One thing the show didn't explore was Hannibal's worst sensory nightmare: feces. For him, stool is closely linked to both prison ("watching the diaper cart go by") and the horrific death of his sister. In Hannibal, the scent of a soiled diaper on a airplane gives him a traumatic flashback dream about Mischa:

The "holes in the floor" of Hannibal's memory palace are oubliettes, dungeons where he stores all his bad memories to forget about them:

Even though Hannibal probably didn't see Mischa's teeth in the stool pit in the show (since his backstory was changed), it's alluded to with Alana's threat to take his toilet (his entire toilet, not just the seat like in the book).

This line is mostly a quote from The Silence of the Lambs, except for "the company of the dead" addition. It leads straight into one of Hannibal's flashbacks about Abigail. Based on how the lights black out, I can only assume Hannibal's memories about Abigail are negative. Is he falling down the rank oubliettes of his mind when he thinks of her? Does he regret killing her at all? We can only guess.

Knowing this, the proximity of the toilet to his prison bed is crazy. They had a huge room to put his bed anywhere, and they chose to put it right next to the toilet? Lol.

Cleanliness

Clean smells are Hannibal's favorite thing, hands down. They are in direct opposition to the stool pit, and a metaphor for innocence, purity, washing away sins, etc. The first thing we see him do after killing Abigail is take a shower, washing blood from his skin, washing away the past...

He loves the soap and lotion store in Florence (the Farmacia di Santa Maria Novella), "one of the best-smelling places on Earth," because it takes him away from bad memories.

The copper bathtub from season 3 is based on Hannibal's memories of washing Mischa:

Clean smells are Hannibal's conscious avenue to his obsession with Clarice Starling:

Clarice has her own Proustian association with clean smells, since her mother was a cleaning lady at a motel. Matching childhood olfactory associations--cute!

It's subtle in the show, but Will is associated with cleanliness as well:

Absolute Freak Behavior

Now I just want to show how extreme the scent thing is, for anyone who hasn't read the books... like...

Trying to smell Clarice from a hundred yards away:

After sniffing the handle of Clarice's car door and not getting anything, he breaks in and has a religious experience in the driver's seat:

In conclusion, Hannibal from the novels is a straight-up cross between Ratatouille and an A/B/O universe transplant. You can't tell me that this man doesn't have the biggest scent kink in the world. His partner walks out of the shower smelling like his favorite soap and it's game over.

[gender-thief2]

random death note headcanons part two (except it isn’t just sleep ones this time wowie):

light gets migraines from staring at screens for too long, and takes advil religiously, he never complains about being in pain though because he hates admitting weakness. L finds this all very amusing, and decides to take his advil and watch light search for it with growing franticness, while saying the most cheeky shit like “is something wrong light??” and light KNOWS he took it but refuses to say anything so he just sits there with a headache all night, and eventually has to turn in early because he doesn’t feel well. L decides to slip the advil back into his bag because he “doesn’t want this to interfere with the case”, and “can’t have light not being on his A game”, totally not because he feels bad or anything though because L does NOT feel things no sir.

light is very surprised to find out that L actually doesn’t like coffee, because he himself definitely finds himself needing it for working all these long hours. L actually drinks tea (being british of course), and is able to stay up for as long as he can because he is genuinely just built different (he’s extremely paranoid and can’t sleep unless his body just shuts down). Light is annoyed by this because, in his eyes, its just one more thing that L is better at than him.

L doesn’t actually clean himself in the shower, he just stands there because he’s used to his life sized washing machine (look it up), and this annoys Light to no end because he is an extreme neat freak.

L is chronically freezing, and Light is very warm.

L bites his nails when he thinks and Light tells him to stop, this eventually causes him to break the habit all together.

L has all of his shirts specially made with no tags on them, and all of his clothes and sheets are made with fabric he hand picked to be a pleasant sensory (he is autism (he is visible in your children, and if he can help it, invisible to you-))

in my last post i mentioned Light having nightmares, he has nightmares about being in solitary confinement, because being alone like that for such a long time is bound to effect you in some way. he also has nightmares about weird black notebooks and death gods…but who knows what that’s about!

his nightmares grow fewer and farther between as he starts feeling safer with L, and safer in this new environment.

i might make more of these this is fun

[bucksaiga]

Tw for PTSD, thoughts of suicide, self harm

God I feel like if Billy survived his PTSD would be so horrible.

He would probably feel like things were crawling inside his skin for a long time. The way he would scratch his arms until they bled would leave nasty scars everywhere.

He’d be afraid to go out into the sun, thinking it would burn him. He’d probably become agoraphobic and never want to go outside, because the last time he was out in a crowd, he panicked. He just can’t do it again. He can’t be around people anymore.

He would hear voices. dark whispers calling his name, and he’d cover his ears, crying for them to shut the fuck up.

And the nightmares? Oh, the nightmares would be dreadful. Fuck sleep, he’d never get any of that again. All he would remember is the people he hurt, the people he got killed in all of this.

He’d remember how he almost died, and still feel the pain of being pierced by the mind flayer’s tentacles.

He would have heightened senses, or think he does, or maybe he experiences sensory overload now. Everything’s brighter, Everything’s louder. Even a dog barking outside makes him jumpy. And he can always smell things. What is that? The smell of something rotting? He smells it all the time. He would think it’s coming from his own body, but it isn’t.

Billy would shower—constantly. The water would always be cold, because…he likes it cold. That’s all he would be able to remember. He’d be used to it.

Anytime someone would come over to visit, the house would be dark, freezing and all the curtains would be closed. He’d probably give someone a key to enter, because he’d never come to the door. He would always stay in bed, or in a corner. He couldn’t even stand eye contact with anyone. Partly because of shame and guilt, partly because he was afraid to hurt someone.

Steve was the only one who dared to get close enough. “You need some sunlight in here, buddy.” He’d say as he would try to open the curtain, only to be tackled to the ground by a panicked Billy.

“You can’t stay in here like this! You’re gonna kill yourself!” Steve would shout through the struggle.

“Yeah, well maybe I should!” Billy would shout back.

The sudden admission would be met with silence, and for the first time in months, Billy would make eye contact with someone. He would quickly let Steve go, and turn away from him.

“Get out.”

And Steve would refuse.

“This isn’t a way to live. You’ve gotta let a little sunlight in. It’ll feel like it’s still alive if you keep it so dark and cold in here.”

Eventually, he’d let a little sunlight in. Maybe he’d let Steve in too. But it would take time. A really long time.

[palepinkgoat]

* Wednesday Tag Game*

I've been tagged by so many sweeties! @heymacy @energievie @deedala @suzy-queued @jrooc

name: karen

age: * D E E P S I G H*

location: dirty south

what is your DJ name?  Olde Antipsychotic 💊

if you were a genre of music, what would it be? Whatever genre the B-52s are.

what would you title your biography? I Thought I'd Be Better at This

what are the first three things you'd do if you were invisible? Sneak into places! Fancy plays for example? Can I eat something? Then fancy restaurants. I don't know. Maybe the Oscars. I feel like I should say The White House but I don't give a shit.

what subject do you wish was taught in every school? personal finance, but make it fun.

when was the last time you tried something for the first time and what was it? I honestly can only think about crawfish and that was a few years ago at a low country boil party. I did not enjoy it.

what is the most underrated city you have ever visited? Fargo, North Dakota.

what day in your life would you like to relive? The day I graduated high school. I hated school (and was "bad" at it but mostly because I had a bunch of undiagnosed disabilities) and was bullied a lot my whole school career. It was one of the best days of my life to know I'd never need to do that again, or see any of those stupid fucks again. I was free.

if you could eliminate one thing from your daily routine, what would it be and why? showering. I feel like it's such a waste of time. I hate being damp so it's a sensory nightmare when I get out. But sometimes in there it's nice. But it's not my favorite.

how long would you last in a zombie apocalypse? maybe a month but the second i run out of my meds i’m screwed! <--- @heymacy said it best

what would be the most surprising scientific discovery imaginable? I saw a conspiracy theory-esque tv show about how mermaids are real - they are just way down deep and look terrifying and alien. There was footage and I still hope it was real. Basically learning what lurks at the very bottom of the ocean would make all our brains explode I'm pretty sure.

if you could have any view out your office window, what would you choose? I'm scared of the water, but a lake sounds nice. It would be cool to have chickens again, so maybe like 10 of those pecking around and pooping on everything. Because sadly that's mostly what chickens do. Destroy gardens and poop everywhere. But they are still pretty wonderful. tagging @gallawitchxx @samantitheos @mybrainismelted @francesrose3 @michellemisfit @wehangout @transmurderbug

@blue-disco-lights

[mosscreeper-ao3]

October 2024 writing challenges directory

Flufftober (prompts from @flufftober)

Pairings are in green. Please be mindful of the difference between "/" (romantic or sexual) and "&" (platonic) pairings

Lost pet meet cute-Kaidan & Rocky (his dog from my main mShenko series)

"Left, other left!"-mShenko

Favorite scent-Kaidan & the Normandy crew

Market day-MFE friendship

Acorn, pinecone, chestnut-Jaith

Mistaken identity-Keith & Shiro (Broganes)

Hoodie weather-Jaith

Chopping and piling wood-mShenko

"Don't do that." "but-Jaith

Bet, game, contest-Jaith, Veraxca, MFE friendship

Ingredients and spells-Paladin friendship

"This is spooky." "Really?"-Klance

Attic, cellar, hidden room-solo Keith

Fantasy AU/Mundane AU-Jaith

"What are you wearing?" "It's laundry day."-Jaith

Yes, no, maybe-Jaith

Rainy Day (alt prompt)-Jaith

Bewitched-Jaith

Yarn-mShenko

Paw-Keith & Kosmo

Bonfire-mShenko

Heirloom-solo James Griffin

Stormy night-Jaith

Comfort food-MFE friendship

Haunted house-Klance

"I can't find it."-mShenko

Afternoon stroll-mShenko

Lucky charm-MFE friendship, Jaith

Time capsule-Paladin Friendship

"Forever?"-Jaith

"Make a wish."-Jaith

Whumptober (prompts from @whumptober)

This one is mostly split into two fics with each prompt being a chapter. One exploring James' emotional state after Keith leaves and the other exploring Keith being captured during a BoM mission.

A few prompts are turned into one shots and drabble collections.

Keith's fic (Dear Agony) covers the following prompts

Day 1-race against the clock/search party

Day 3-set up for failure/wrongfully arrested

Day 4-hallucination/sensory deprivation

Day 7-only for emergencies/unconventional weapons

Day 8-sleep deprivation/forced to stay awake

Day 12-starvation/"just a little more"

Day 16-necrosis/wound cleaning

Day 21-body horror/spirit possession

Day 22-bleeding through the bandages/reopening wounds

Day 24-radiation poisoning/equipment failure

Day 26-nightmares/parting words regret

Day 29-fatigue/"who said you could rest?"

James' fic (Terms and Conditions) will cover the following prompts

Day 2-trust issues/role reversal

Day 5-sunburn/heatstroke

Day 6-not realizing they're injured/unhealthy coping mechanism

Day 9-obsession/broken window

Day 11-seeing double/loneliness

Day 13-team as family/"death will do us part

Day 14-left for dead/“Because I want you to know what it feels like to be haunted”

Day 18-revenge/loss of identity

Day 23-forced choice/broken pedestal

Day 28-denial/CCTV

Day 31-asking for help/"I'm alive, I'm just not well"

Jaith drabble +ficlet collection (Twin Skeletons)

Day 10-blow to the head/"I can't think straight"

Day 15-childhood trauma/"I did good, right?"

Day 17-nowhere else to go/"we had a good run"

Shiro drabble collection (I've Grown Tired of This Body)

Day 25-surgery/"it's for your own good", solo Shiro

Day 27-voiceless/muzzled, solo Shiro

Day 30-recovery/"what have I done", solo Shiro

One shots

Day 19-blood trail/"is there anybody out there?", Paladins

Day 20-emotional angst/"it's not your fault, Shiro & Keith (broganes)

Kinktober below the cut

Kinktober (prompts from @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction)

Pairings are in green.

Edging-Jaith

Love bites-Jaith

Breath play-Shiro/Curtis

First time-Allurance (all Allurance will have trans Lance)

Nipple play-Allurance

Mirror sex-Jaith

Secret reltionships-mShenko

Fingering-Romelle/Allura

Sex pollen-Jaith

Scissoring-Allurance

Threesome-Kallurance

Kneeling-Jaith

Shower-Klance

Begging-mShenko

Surrender-mShenko

Public-mShenko

Praise kink-Jaith

Psychic bonds-femShep/Liara

Fuck or die-Jaith

Whipping-Shiro/Curtis

Bondage-Shiro/Curtis

Shotgunning-Jaith (college AU)

Blindfold-Allurance

On the desk-Jaith

Sleepy sex-Shiro/Curtis

Marking-Jaith

Body worship-mShenko

Face sitting-Romelle/Allura

Hair pulling-mShenko

Afternoon delight-Shiro/Curtis

Free space, swimming-Jaith